today, i started my morning by reading these words written by Paul J. Pastor:
"today could see you laugh or weep, curse the heavens or bless the whole world.
it could see you fall into the darkest sin or rise to unimagined righteousness.
it could hold death for your family, sickness for your friends, good fortune for your enemy,
or the opposite of all of those.
you could lose your reputation today or gain a better one.
you could feast or find yourself hungry.
you might be alive when the stars appear tonight. you might not be.
all your plans could go through or none of them, like a breeze carries the morning fog to places the mist doesn't choose.
boast of nothing.
of what can i be confident, then?
your Father's love.
turn to me. I am faithful.
I promise: though the world is changeable, carrying you where you don't expect, my goodness is in every place. I will help you find it and learn to rest forever my hand.
Father, let me expect nothing of life except to know you better and love you fully."
do you ever read something and it stops you in your tracks?
that was me this morning.
it was like Paul Pastor wrote those words many years ago just for me to read them today.
let me expect nothing of life except to know you better and love you fully
i reread that line over and over again & let every word linger in my heart.
what do you expect from life?
i expected many things.
but i have sat and looked grief in its eyes this last year. i have come to face the truth that many of my dreams have slipped through my fingers.
that what i had hoped for did not come to pass.
that i cried more tear than i wished to.
that i lost more loved ones than i had ever imagined i would.
yet in all this.
the blazing realization that all of life has but one hope.
all my existence has but one expectation.
to know Him. to love Him. to live in a constant dance of loving and being loved by the Hands that crafted my body in the womb...
i am still mesmerized.
mesmerized at how wrong i have been all this time.
all this time of me chasing my dreams (good dreams, may i add) while missing His dream for me.
i remember one tuesday evening i was hosting community group at our home.
everyone was sitting in the quiet of our dimly lit room hushing their souls to hear His voice.
in the stillness i heard the Father tell me:
i will strip you of everything you love until i become what you love the most.
and He did not lie.
but it was not His anger that stripped me.
it was not His punishment, not His wrath, not His judgement.
it was His love.
| Miraculous, the way you captivate my heart- I can’t resist.
Your Presence is a force to be reckoned with.
No shelter from the fury of your love. |
fury of His love
fury of His love
fury of His love
did you know?
that His love for you is so great, so wild, so violent-
that He will take you and move you into the flames of refinement to purify you of any such hindrance that would create space between Him and His beloved?
it is His mercy.
for what a gruesome loss would it be to spend your whole life imagining you were doing the Lord's work while forgetting to minister to the Lord Himself?
you can expect many things from life.
you can expect the storms, the losses, the persecution.
you can expect the seasons of peace and the seasons of turmoil.
you can expect love to come with the pain.
joy to come with the sorrow.
yet though our circumstances may fail, His love for us is faithful.
may you be encouraged today in knowing that your life does not amount to the circumstances you find yourself in.
that with joy (even joy through the tears if that's where you are...) you can chase after the one who loves you & longs to be loved by you.
the Lord your God is in your midst,
a mighty one who will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness;
He will quiet you by His love;
He will exult over you with loud singing.